


Rosenrot

by Willowshade



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Annie-Centric, Canon Compliant, F/M, Language of Flowers, Mutual Pining, aruaniweek2021, intentionally vague, spoilers from the manga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-20
Updated: 2021-03-20
Packaged: 2021-03-28 00:13:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30131043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willowshade/pseuds/Willowshade
Summary: "...I've never seen white lilies at this time of the year before." Armin murmured, amazed, picking one from the ground almost apologetically, analyzing it from all sides in his hand.So those little flowers made it worthy his effort to walk here? She reasoned, watching him- He really was a strange one. But she didn't dislike that about him. In fact, the more she looked at him, the less Annie found to dislike.
Relationships: Armin Arlert/Annie Leonhart
Comments: 6
Kudos: 47





	Rosenrot

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Spoilers from those not caught up with the manga! 
> 
> Some mentions of blood and violence, but nothing too specific. Written for Aruani2021week for the prompt "day 3: flower".

-

-

-

It was rumored that Annie Leonhardt, the fearsome warrior candidate for the female titan, was afraid of insects.

There were some other rumors about her as well, about her reclusive father, about her absent mother, far more darker ones, but she didn’t care for them, she barely listened at all. It was just this one small misunderstanding she couldn’t let go- because it wasn’t true.

She did think insects were gross, but fear wasn’t the emotion they evoked in her. She may have faltered in fright when cockroach flew in her direction, just once. Liberios’ alleys were always dirty, so she was used to the insects crawling out of the trash bins, but none had seemed to want to attack her before- to go direct for her face. One second of jumping back with a loud yell of disgust was enough to make the others warrior candidates amused. Annie was lingering behind the group as usual, so they were far enough to not be worried about a similar assault, but close enough to be able to witness her evident distress.

Someone may have laughed- she didn’t know who- perhaps Porco. They were always looking for cracks in her mask, just waiting for the moment she would falter. She felt heat rush to her cheeks before a deep frown took over her features, the crushing feeling of inadequacy quickly vanished to be replaced by a surge of blinding rage. She trampled the cockroach under her heel the moment it tried to escape climbing the wall with a flat kick, a sickening crunchy noise followed. 

Short, quick huffs of breath left her lips, as she cleaned the sole of her shoe on the pavement, head bowed forward.

“Annie… are you okay?” Pieck asked hesitantly, still lingering afar with the others.

-

-

-

No, she wasn’t.

She had a bad ache on her leg, making it painful to just stand still. It was the aftermath of kicking down her father so many times that he couldn’t get up anymore- and she hasn’t eaten anything since lunch, too afraid of returning home and facing his wrath, or worse, his rejection. Still, she was training hand-to-hand combat into the sunset of the military patio, sweating away the little of the water she had to drink all day.

She kept her hands raised against her head as she was taught to, her face a blank canvas projecting nothing of her inner turmoil.

“Okay- my turn.” Reiner said, something of a smile on his face as he took position in front of her, his hands fisted loosely.

She was glad he was the last one she had to fight. He wasn’t much of a threat, so she could relax a bit. His form was still off, even if he was improving a bit over the months.

“I’m going-” He announced. Before she could as much as blink, Reiner suddenly jumped in front of her with a punch prepared.

Instead of stepping back, she dodged, his fist flying over her shoulder as she ducked. Using his momentum, she grabbed the back of his hair with both hands and brought his face crashing down across her raised knee.

She was satisfied to see Reiner stumbling back by the force of her blow, she didn’t trust her fists or her bad leg to be able to push him away as efficiently.

“Arg!” He shouted in pain, steam coming out of his nose as he instantly healed its ruptured vessels. “What the hell is your problem?!"

Annie couldn’t even answer, she felt almost sick. Her arms dropped down as the fight was clearly over. She was exhausted. Suddenly Reiner grinned, his mouth all bloody from his injury. “I told them someone had to knock you down a notch. Now I don’t feel bad at all.”

Annie frowned, irritated. “What are you talking about-”

She froze mid-sentence then as she felt something crawling against her neck. A bug- he put a bug in her head the moment she dodged his attack. Annie’s eyes widened in disgust as she instantly swatted her hands against her hair, trying to get rid of it in a frenzy.

Reiner chuckled, along with others.

It was all a set up- she realized, her hair falling messily against her face as her eyes widened- it was a punishment. Because they hated her. Everyone hated her- even her father now. Suddenly there was a painful knot on her throat, and her eyes glazed over with tears.

She vaguely remembers crushing the bug in her sole, and then jumping to attack Reiner, kicking him with her good leg and shouting. It was exactly the same with her father earlier that day. It felt like an out of body experience, almost something out of a dream.

She cried all the way back to her house. Nobody teased her about bugs anymore after that.

-

-

-

Her father wasn’t angry, it seemed. He was overjoyed at how strong she had become, even if now he walked with a cane, limping at every step.

_Nothing makes sense,_ the thought stuck her suddenly, as she stood in the battlefield. A cut on her finger was all it took- part of the military complex vanished in a explosion. She rose from the debris, now standing taller, taller, taller. She could see the outline of a city to destroy stretch across her eyes helplessly. She looked down, watching enemies running for their lives- tiny, dark dots swarming at her feet.

_Think of them as insects! Crush them for you honor- for homeland Marley!_

Everyone expected her to falter, Annie herself expected to falter. She didn’t. Perhaps because she was a killer already, she had killed to get this power, even if she didn’t remember it. She could kill again, and it wasn’t even hard. Never one to believe in war propaganda, a part of her could agree to the sentiment behind it. They did look like insects- tiny ants to trample under her feet. She had done it a countless times now in her life, perhaps without even noticing, at each step she took.

It wasn’t any different.

-

-

-

It wasn’t any different, she thought, as she picked the petals apart, one by one.

She sitting down against the wet grass, legs crossed in front of her, hands busy depriving a rose bush of its lovely red flowers. It was the beginning of nightfall in a winter day, but Annie wasn’t shaking out of cold- something else was making her movements frantic, something like a scream trapped in her throat, or bubbling laugher.

She heard the steps coming in her direction, as they always would. She didn’t look up.

“Annie-” Berthold started, unsure, coming to a stop close by. “Don’t wander off like this. Reiner was wondering where you went.”

Something dark come over her expression then- she wanted to be alone, for fuck’s sake! Why couldn’t they get this? Suddenly, in her mind’s eye a reverie started to play. She could desert the mission right now, if only Berthold turned his back. They wouldn’t notice her leaving at night. She could shift to scale the walls and run back to the shore while the titans were inactive. Then, swim back home and shift back into human, find a way into the forest where her father should be.

He told her he would be waiting for her. It was all that mattered.

And yet, if the mission didn’t matter, if Reiner and Berthold didn’t matter, why was she still trapped in this hell-hole Island? What was she waiting for- for the moment they would be found out and killed like the monsters they were?

She ignored Berthold for a long while, yet he didn't leave. Unable to find answers, she just kept crushing the flowers into her palms, venting out her frustration.

“I’m coming back in a moment.” She replied, at last, her voice low and controlled.

He left, eventually. Annie let out a sight, feeling the exhaustion of the day creep into her muscles, making her rest her hands on her knees, her head doubling down under the weight of her worries.

She noticed then the disconnected petals fallen in her lap and stuck against her fingers. In the dark like this she couldn't help but to see them as droplets of blood.

-

-

-

Nobody suspected them, at all.

Annie felt almost bitter about it. She had mixed feelings about their apparent successful infiltration. It was dragging- it’s been three years already and they still had no idea where the founder titan was. To speed the process, Reiner told them, they would better enlist into the military. So before Annie could realize she was wearing an uniform and doing drills until the sunset again. She had had enough of those already- lifetimes worth of it. She didn’t feel a ounce of guilty at skipping out lessons that wouldn't affect her grades. 

So she found herself with far more free time than she knew what to do with it. In Marley she couldn't effort to be laid back like this. While she still had to be one of the best here, everything came easier to her, she was just going through the motions beaten down on her, deep seated in her bones. She would finished exercises quickly and took off on her own to wander around the base periodically

This camp wasn't painted in grey and brown hues of Liberio, instead it stood in a large stripe of land, surrounded by forests and rivers and mountains, a mix of splashes of color that she couldn't help but rest her eyes on while she spaced out in the middle lecture, looking over the window. Sometimes she would be drawn to it. As Annie wandered the edges of the forest she took a deep breath and exhaled slowly- feeling grateful for the fresh odor of leaves and wood entering her lungs. She looked over one shoulder just to make sure no one was watching her, and took a sit by the trunk of a three, closing her eyes just then.

If anything, despite the pressure of their inevitable future, in some moments she was almost peaceful.

-

-

-

She talked less and less with Reiner and Berthold about the mission- they couldn’t effort to raise suspicions. In the down time between one meeting and the other, it was almost like she was a normal person, the same type of human as the other trainees.

_I’m living another life_ \- she thought one day, after telling the girls in the barracks about her “past”- the fabrication held more truth than she was comfortable with: She told them she was adopted by a single father, that taught her how to fight. They lived in a forest in the middle of nowhere. She always intended to be in the military (police). However, in this version of her life, she was living on the other side of the ocean, and her father was eaten by a titan- because he couldn’t run with his bad limp, she left him behind to save herself.

“I’m very sorry.” Mina told her, touching her arm, tears in her eyes.

Annie felt oddly guilty for killing her imagined father like this. Perhaps because it felt like a betrayal to her real one.

“Let’s talk about something else- you’all making me depressed.” Ymir whined, throwing her a look with a raised eyebrow, as if asking _“get your shit together, will you?”_

Annie nodded imperceptivity, knowing Ymir was looking out for her in a roundabout way. She appreciated it, even if she didn’t deserve it.

"Why don't we talk about your thingy with Thomas, Hannah?" Ymir changed the subject suddenly, making the girl in question squirm. 

"Well- it's kind of obvious. We really like each other." Hannah replied shyly, a smile on her lips. "It's wonderful." 

That made the barracks way more lively than their previous attempt to strike personal conversation with Annie. She watched the commotion, listening to it down to details. Hannah words sparked great interest in the other girls, they listened to her tales of love with lounging in their expressions. Quickly Hannah grew embarrassed and said she was done talking, that it was their turn to talk about who they liked- which only made the girls more excitable. It seemed everyone had a _crush,_ someone they liked, even if they weren't in a relationship like Hannah and Thomas. 

Annie vaguely knew about romance. It was something that happened around her- she remembered seeing courageous couples holding hands and hugging in shores at evening, away from the eyes of their guards. She was familiar with brothels too, they littered in the slums of Liberio, close to the gates. She must have been born in one, she reasoned. Her biological father was a Marlean and her mother an Eldian, and brothel seemed like the ideal place for them to meet. They probably didn't love each other, as she was abandoned right after birth. She doubted any of the women working in such places could love their clients, they were treated badly, so they wouldn't love their babies either. Despite of the devil taboo, Eldian brothels were very popular among Marlean men- something that disgusted her. If a man could fuck and humiliate an Eldian woman it was probably considered a fair retribution to all of mankind.

She was half expecting the girls to ask her opinion on the subject, to pull her into conversation again, unaware of how dark her expression had became in tune to her thoughts.

Of course, none did.

-

-

-

_"Listen- Not even your close relatives will be able to understand what is like to be a Warrior. None but us, here. We just had our lives cut short to 13 years ahead, that's the truth, we're sacrifices, even if it was for the glory our generous fatherland-"_

_As Annie listened to Zeke's words after training, she couldn't help but to notice how his tone grew forced when he talked about Marley. She was sat in a circle together with the other warriors as per the request of their Warchief, saying that he wanted to tell them something important before they headed to battle._

_"That's why-" He smiled suddenly. "We have to try to find joy in every little thing." He adjusted his glasses on his face, and yet his eyes didn't match his smile. His eyes were chilling. "Something we like, something we value. A reason to keep living-"_

Annie had dismissed Zeke's words in the past, not willing to place her trust in someone that felt artificial most of the time. But right now, she couldn't help but to turn his advice over and over in her brain, finding that it had some meaning after all. Perhaps because she was older, growing more aware of her years passing, of the sand running inside the hourglass, never to turn back again. 

Joy was too much, though, but Zeke was right about finding small things to appreciate. Life didn't make any sense, everything was meaningless- Annie found, so what difference did it make if she was growing more dedicated to leisure on her free time? None. She changed a bit. She was getting more comfortable living in this shitty world. The Island wasn't as bleak as Liberio and she found herself getting more relaxed. She would still accomplish her mission at all costs, she would still return to her father because that was her _reason_ , but she knew it wouldn’t bring her the simple satisfaction she got from eating candy after sneaking out of military camp. 

She was sat on top of a trash bin, in an dark alley that resembled all alleys she had to crawl over while back in Marley. Different places, same destiny- it seemed. Her investigation turned out with no leads, again, but at least she was eating something good in the middle of a dump. She was doing it for herself, and nobody would know.

Nobody would know that she salvaged one book out of a crate by the garbage, either. She didn't pause to question her actions, suddenly she was compelled to grab it without much of a glance and stuff on her bag quickly, as if afraid someone might appear to judge her for it. 

-

-

-

Contrary to the popular trend, Annie wasn't going to the town festival for the holiday.

She didn't have any money on her, she had spent all her savings on disguises to wear while she investigated in Sina and food to console her after each failed attempt. More than that, she was lounging for the opportunity to be left alone in their break so she could finish the book she found a few nights ago.

She was enjoying it far too much- she knew it was bad, like wishy-washy, cliché, yet something about the romance kept grabbing her attention in the middle of classes as she would start imagining what might happen in the next pages. She would caught herself anxious to retreat to the forest where she hid it so she could get the story out of her brain reading it to the end. 

Today she would do it. Annie had many hiding spots in the forest, she figured it would it be better than having just one and risking exposing everything if it was found out. She carefully traced the steps to the place where the book was buried in a bag along with her most incriminating evidence- a fake ID, a switchblade and written notes on the information she had so far about the royal family. 

Annie put her stolen shovel into work then, only stopping to wash her hands so she wouldn't smear with dirty the pages of the book. Maybe she should use another hiding place- she reasoned, wiping the sweat that broke in her bow after the exercise with the back of her hand. A part of her knew she was overthinking this, that she could just bring the book with her to the barracks and say she bought it last holiday. It wouldn't raise suspicious about her, because she was just another girl reading a romance. But she didn't want anyone to know. She didn't want anyone to know her. 

She found a good spot to sit close to the camp after wandering for a while. It was surrounded by tall trees but the shade was incomplete, sun rays passing through the canopy and falling in a small clearing where a patch of white lilies stood. Annie sat right in front of it, supporting her back on a tree trunk, and planting her feet in the ground.

She was about to open the book but something made her move forward and rip one of the flowers from the soil. She toyed absently minded with one petal caught between her fingers, as if wondering if she should pluck them out. She still hadn't got over her childish compulsions- she killed insects if they dared to exist next to her, she pulled at flowers that were too pretty for her eyes. 

This time she hesitated, however, as she was reminded of one part in the book in which the main character compared the girl he loved to a red rose, of all things- how cliché, part of her judged- even if she couldn't stop reading. It was the first time she consciously associated a person to a flower. In Liberio, there never were many of them. The first time she realized how deprived of color her town was when they paraded as war heroes on the streets of Marley. People would throw them red hued flowers and smiles, as if those grew everywhere. At some point, they each got a bouquet from little kids, then at night they returned to the the alleys where they belonged and where such pretty, delicate things stood out ridiculously, they almost seemed to make fun of their grey lives. So Annie threw that bouquet into a sewage drain, enraged- fuck them, she didn't need their gratitude or their fake respect. The red flowers quickly submerged in the dirty water and she smiled, something like relief in her chest. She hated that color, it was the one in their armbands and the official color in Marley military festivities- something Annie always associated with the bloodshed they brought upon their enemies.

In Paradis, it was different, it was all so green, pre-industrial like. There were different shades, all types of them. The flowers were everywhere. There they felt less like an offense to her eyes and more like something she couldn't allow herself to enjoy.

She spared the lily, for now- she reasoned, resting it against the grass and picking up her book again.

-

-

-

At some point- minutes? hours?- she heard the distinct noise of dry leaves being crushed under someone's steps. Her attention was ripped from the book sharply, she stood in place, snapping it shut as quietly as she could. She almost expected Berthold to appear behind her back as she turned to look over her shoulder, but it wasn't him. It was Armin. Armin limping as he supported himself with a cane- his left foot immobilized in what she recognized as a medical boot. 

What was he doing here? She thought ducking behind the tree trunk again, her heartbeat escalating quickly inside her chest as her thoughts ran. Was he forced to stay in the camp because of his injuries, missing out the town festival? Why wasn't him in the infirmary then? He hadn't noticed her yet, but he was heading straight to where she was. 

She found herself oddly paralyzed, unable to move. Of all people to could find her- she didn't particularly mind him. 

"Annie..." He greeted, surprised, spotting her soon enough. 

"Armin." She greeted back lowly. She still had the book closed on her lap- she followed his eyes and saw him look directly at it. Well, there went her secret. But she wasn't the only one brushing past set limits here.

"Should you be walking in this state?" She asked, genuinely intrigued.

"I was tired of staying inside all day. So I grabbed some painkillers and hooped here." He said with a sheepish smile, limping ahead to where the lilies were.

Annie snorted suddenly- she could see it now, his limp was half dragging his bad left foot, half jumping on his other leg. Her amusement quickly vanished when he tried to sit down and almost fell on his back, catching his weight with both hands behind him just before hitting ground, his cane falling messily on the grass. 

Armin laughed at himself. "I guess the morphine dose was a bit too strong. My balance is off."

"Is this even allowed?" Annie raised one eyebrow, feeling nervous all of sudden. She quickly brought her back flat against the trunk again, not realizing she had leaned in his direction in anticipation of his fall, as if to help him. 

"I know it's illegal." He told her. "But I am just borrowing it, I mean-I'm buying some back to put in the infirmary as soon as I can go to the capitol. If I don't use a strong analgesic I might not be able to use the 3DMG in two days. I had to test its effects so I'd know what to expect in the test."

She was surprised at his implication, but didn't let it show in her expression. Their following 3DMG practical exam was one of the most important evaluations in their grading. Shadis was threatening to expel those who failed at it for weeks now. 

"Yeah- I know I'm probably going to fail. Shadis personally came to talk to me after I sprained my ankle in training." Armin replied, his expression darkening ever so slightly, despite the warm glow of the sun falling on his face. "But I would be damned if I fail without trying my best-" 

Annie didn't know what to say. She didn't want him to fail, but she couldn't imagine how he would be able to keep his balance with the 3DMG feet straps pulling his injury at each swing. 

"-but It doesn't hurt at all, because of the medication- so this might work." Armin finished hopefully, eyeing her, and she felt as if he was consoling her in a backwards way. 

"Good luck." She was going for a flat tone, but it came out shaky and truthful out of her lips. Like she sincerely wanted him to succeed. What for? Just because of how determined he was? He had better chances of surviving if he dropped out of the military. 

"Thank you, Annie." He replied, offering her a small smile. "...I am just resting for a bit here- than I will leave you alone again." 

"What?" She gapped, surprised at how fast the conversation changed. 

"You were reading, right?" He gestured to her book, making her feel self-conscious, even though she knew he had seen it already. 

"Don't tell anyone. If you do..." She threatened, glaring at him. 

"I'm not." He told her, all seriously, like he was really making a promise. "Please, don't tell anyone about the morphine either." 

"I won't." She replied, frowing, repulsed at the idea of taking the only chance of succeeding from him.

They lapsed into silence then. It wasn't uncomfortable. Annie was watching him as she pretended to read from her book, unable to focus, but Armin didn't seem to notice, he seemed distracted enough by the flowers in front of them. He told her that she was right, he shouldn't be walking so much in this state, he meant to go a bit further to his favorite place in the forest - Annie wondered where that was - but he said he was satisfied by this shorter walk all the same. 

"...I've never seen white lilies at this time of the year before." He explained, amazed, picking one from the ground almost apologetically, analyzing it from all sides in his hand. 

So those little flowers made worthy his effort of coming here? Annie reasoned- He really was a strange one. But she didn't dislike that about him. In fact, the more she looked at him, the less Annie found to dislike. She was never neutral about him like she was with everyone else. She couldn't help but to notice him by Mikasa's and Eren's side all the time. Eren was rough, Mikasa was cold, but Armin just seemed... gentle, nice. 

When he started to get up, all awkwardly to avoid putting weight on his bad foot, she almost told him that he didn't need to leave. That she could leave him to the flowers, if he was so fond of them. No- She could stay too, she wouldn't mind reading with him at a distance. She wouldn't mind talking a bit more. Heat rose to her cheeks in response to her thoughts. Of course, not a single word left her mouth.

"See you later, Annie." He told her, his eyes sad. "Thank you for listening as usual." 

-

-

-

She finished her book and was in a bad mood. It wasn't a happy ending, she had even cried.

The hero betrayed the heroine at the last act- they were from enemy countries in a conflict. Despite many signs of their imminent downfall, she had hoped they could reach an understanding before the end. That their feelings would be enough to guarantee a future where they could be together. 

She was wrong, the story wasn't a romance. It was a tragedy all along, she just didn't want to see past the sweet first impression.

-

-

-

Armin passed in the 3DMG exam, somehow. 

Part of her knew he would do it. He seemed destined to great things, even if it was at odds with his poor performance in training. He even managed to heal his foot in what would be record time, if not for a shifter. She meant to congratulate him for his success, but they weren't that close for this familiarity. She didn't know what to do with the urge to talk to him again.

"...Have you ever been obsessed with someone?" She asked Mina before falling asleep, in one day they were lazing in their room.

Mina looked at her oddly, before smirking. "Oh, maybe you had a crush that I never got to know of?" 

Annie frowned. A crush was- wrong. She was pretty sure Zeke's advice was meant for them to enjoy innocuous things- candy, stolen books, a walk in the forest- and not the company of someone that was an enemy of their country.

"No, it isn't like that. I don't have time for this kind of thing." Annie drawled, yawning.

She had her mission to accomplish after all, she couldn't effort to loose her focus... 

-

-

-

Except that she already lost it, without even noticing. 

They were in the forest again, in that same place. This time Armin was the one with a book. He was reading it aloud to her, the paced tone of his words was almost like a lullaby. 

Annie was sleepy- stretched on the grass, laying on her back. She was happy, happy as she could ever be. This felt nice. She really did like his company. She just wished she liked it a bit less, so she wouldn't miss it when he went away. 

"I'm sorry- I'm reading the same sentence again and again." Armin chuckled depreciatively, hands brushing against his eyes harshly. Annie wished she could reach out to him and still his movements, it looked painful.

"I feel so tired..." He confessed, a deep sigh leaving his chest.

"You could lay down and sleep right by my side. I don't mind." Annie thought? said?- she wasn't sure, she was half-dozing off anyway. 

Armin shook his head, as if that would be unappropriated. Again she wondered just what he felt towards her. Why he kept coming back if he hated her? He couldn't hate her, right? Perhaps... perhaps he liked her a little bit? She couldn't ask him, though, too afraid of his rejection- part of her wondered if he sought her company out of pity. 

She watched him from under her half closed lids. Had him always been this handsome? She felt her face warmer just from watching him. Somehow, he looked older? Annie felt odd about this one observation, so her gazed to the white lilies by his side, beautiful as always. They never seemed to wither, keeping their beauty across all seasons.

She wondered, not for the first time, if the flowers held any meaning.

-

-

-

"Oh, I figured you wouldn't know about this." Mina had teased her, grabbing one lily into her hands.

"Be careful with it." Annie warned her, protective of the bouquet Armin gave her. He left it in by her side when she was sleeping, much to her surprise. 

They were in their room again. Mina was spending some idle time before a date telling her random things, when Annie suddenly asked her about it. She seemed to know everything about femininity, and language of flowers felt girly enough. 

"Hmm." Her friend hummed, pensive. "It can mean a lot of things. It's not the most romantic flower though- I expected more of Armin." 

Since when she's so familiar with him? Annie thought, almost jealous. Frequently they came together to talk to her, it hadn't escaped her notice. And yet- Mina seemed to tease him all the time about her. _Forget it_ \- She told herself, she was pretty sure Mina already liked someone. 

"What was his name again?" She wondered out loud, unable to remember, but her friend payed her no mind. She was already reciting what she knew about lilies:

"I'm starting with the good part, okay? It can mean humility and devotion. That's very much like him... In a way, perhaps he's saying you're the only one for him." Annie tried to keep her face straight, even if her heartbeat skyrocketed just then.

"The bad part-well..." She paused for a moment, her smile slipping from her face. "It's also a flower popular in funerals, known as the flower of death in some places. It also means that all things come to an end... I guess. It's about the relief you find after you die."

"Mina?" Annie called, worried when her friend seemed about to cry. She felt afraid suddenly. 

-

-

-

"Armin, what are you doing here?" She asked, coming to meet him in the dark alley.

Armin gazed at her, his eyes a mix of apprehension and determination. He pulled his hood back, pausing for a moment. 

"Annie- I-" 

-

-

-

"-I'm sorry." 

She heard him say, his tone so low that it was almost a whisper.

It was dark all around her, like nightfall and Annie couldn't see anything. Please, don't leave me- she wanted to call him out, plead him to stay. She couldn't and he couldn't either-she knew that with all the certainty in her being. She was destined to fall in and out of slumber, voiceless, bodiless, never quite awake- in between life and death.

All alone, until the end of time.

-

-

-

-

-

-

Suddenly, Annie heard Eren's voice echoing loudly in her head, making a shock spread from the top to the end of her spine.. 

His words were clearer than Armin's or Hitch's ever were, but he sounded as if talking from somewhere from far away, his voice echoing endlessly as if carried by the wind.

The next thing she felt was confusion. She felt like she was waking up from a long, long dream. When she opened her eyes, she felt pain. Everything hurt just then, she closed her eyelids for a moment unused to the luminosity- even if it was just the faint light of a pair of torches. Her body convulsed. She couldn't stop coughing- there was a viscous liquid drenching her clothes from head to toe, gagging at her tongue as she tried to breath as if for the first time. She felt her heartbeat so strong it was almost like punches against her ribcage, a surge of pain squeezing her chest suddenly. 

It was as if a fog was lifted from her mind- she remembered everything. Mina's corpse-Marco's corpse. The expedition- the moment she spared Armin, the moment she lost Eren. Hitch letting her return late without asking why she looked so exhausted. Talking to Malowe pleading to be seen as human-Meeting with Armin in the alley- Then a cut on her finger-fighting with Eren-Mikasa telling her _fall-_ And then she fell and it was dark for a longest time.

Tears blurred in her eyes. She was alive. She was alive still.

Annie quietly sobbed in the underground cell where she was held for four eyes, frozen in a crystal, her memories settling into place and the illusions from her dreams leaving her cold as reality finally dawned on her. 

-

She was grateful- despite everything, despite the rumbling. 

If Eren didn't started the rumbling, she might never be able to leave her cage. She wouldn't feel the ground below her feet as she walked, wouldn't be able to talk to Hitch again. 

"Are you okay, Annie?" Hitch asked her, one steadying hand on her shoulder as she wavered in place. 

"Yeah." She breathed, her voice weak. "I'm just getting used to this all again." 

"I expected you to be completely oblivious to everything up until now-" HItch said, misunderstanding her meaning. "But I take you could hear us all this time?" 

"I could." Annie confirmed, gently brushing her hand away as she determined willed her legs to stop trembling. She knew HItch needed some proof, she barely could believe it herself, so she added: "I grew tired of hearing you complain about boys all the time." 

Hitch gapped, blushing. "What! Not only you heard us, but you remember everything too?!" 

"Yeah and I'm grateful." Annie said. It felt like dreams to her, but it was just her mind trying to process her impossible situation and the few stimuli she had in her stasis. "If it wasn't for you and Armin I would certainly go insane from the loneliness. Without you, I might have forgotten I was still alive." 

"...Thank you." Annie repeated, feeling her voice wavering as if she was about to cry again.

-

She was eating pie, yet another miracle. It was the most delicious pie she had in all of her short life. Annie couldn't stop eating it- she hadn't realized before, but she was so hungry it hurt. Thank you Hitch, she thought for the nth time that day.

Suddenly, she felt someone sitting on her side, it was a crowed street and yet something felt familiar about the person. So Annie kept her head low, hoping her hood would hide her features as she ate. 

"Annie?" A familiar voice asked her, incredulous. She raised her head, shell-shocked. It was Connie, only if a lot taller and a bit older. 

"What- Annie?" 

She turned to the man sat by her side slowly stricken by his also familiar voice, and to her horror- it was Armin, a bit taller, a bit older, a lot more rough around the edges. She gapped, frozen in place. What this really happening? It felt something completely out of a romance book- was she dreaming still? She would doubt she even left her crystal if it wasn't by the strong taste of strawberries on her mouth. Her subconscious couldn't come up with such a delicious taste on its own.

It was all real-she realized as she swallowed her food, panicked. Connie started laughing suddenly, making fun of her eating so desperately. Armin told him to stop, looking shocked as she felt. She watched them with ever so widening eyes, trying to figure out what to do next. Hitch was away buying more food- if they were together maybe she could try to talk them into letting her go. But now by herself, Annie would better make a break for it- to leave before they tried to caught her again. 

She got up quickly and jumped away from her seat in a blink of an eye, about to start running just to be stopped by a tight grip on her wrist. She lost her balance then, coming to collide with a solid chest as her momentum was reverted abruptly. 

Armin was holding her in place, his free hand coming to ground her by gripping her shoulder. She looked up, startled all over again by his close proximity. His eyes were wide and his mouth was pressed in a thin line, almost as if he couldn't believe she was there either. Somehow he had reacted quicker than Connie and stopped her before she could take another step away from the table. 

"Stay, Annie." He said lowly, his tone more of plea than a threat. 

She parted her lips, surprised at the relief she felt. Her memories and her dreams about him came to her mind all of once then, every little piece falling into place. She had wanted to look at him for years, but she couldn't stand the strength of his gaze. So she glanced down, feeling her heartbeat rush to her ears and her face burn. 

She stayed.

-

**Author's Note:**

> -  
> Red rose = the flower Annie associated with herself  
> White lily = the flower Armin associated with her 
> 
> My credits to the band Rammstein and their song Rosenrot, which kind of inspired me to write this. Thank you for reading! Feel free to ask any questions if it was too confusing!


End file.
